Memorial Day

I thank God for my life
And for the stars and stripes
May freedom forever fly
Let it ring

Salute the ones who died
The ones that give their lives
So we don't have to sacrifice
All the things we love

My heart is so thankful this Memorial Day. Thankful that there are men & women who were so brave & loved their country so much, that they died fighting for it. And thankful for a selfish reason, too. Thankful that my soldier came home to me- safe, sound, & sweeter than ever. I know many other families were not so lucky. I can't pretend to understand their grief, but I hope they know my heart aches for them, and I will forever be grateful for that ultimate sacrifice.

"True heroism is remarkably sober, very undramatic. It is not the urge to surpass all others at whatever cost, but the urge to serve others at whatever cost." 

I think of all the wars America has seen, and all of the lives lost. I think of the soldiers presently in the Middle East, continuing to fight. They don't want glory, they don't want fame. They do it because they love this country, they love people in this country, and their hearts told them it was right. "Thank you" seems so small and so clumsy, such an inadequate way to express what I feel towards those who lost their lives fighting for mine. But it is all I have, and I offer it to them with sincerity, love, and reverence. 

It's okay if you have the day off of work and are splashing around in a pool with a cold beer in your hand. It's okay to laugh and smile and enjoy the company of loved ones. The fallen soldiers would want that, I think. They fought to keep this country what it is, and fought to keep the American people out of harm's way, with their biggest worry on a late day in May being their tan lines. But as you're grilling out, or napping on the beach, please do reserve a corner of your thoughts & heart today for the courageous souls we've lost along the way. Because all that's left of them is a corner of green grass, a white marble cross, and our profound gratitude.

 Memorialize them. 
They died for you.

Dear Italia,

I know we’ve had our share of ups & downs. (Well, the down was basically me ODing on you if we’re being honest here.) But I just wanted to let you know I’ve seen the error of my ways and I am here to beg forgiveness. The times we spent together were some of the best of my life, and you will forever hold a bellissimo spot in my heart. I can still hear, feel, and taste you, even though our last rendezvous was ages ago. I am ready to dive head-first back into our love affair, if you will have me. Accept my apologies for being such a thoughtless, blasé lover. You are everything, mi amore, and we will be together soon enough.

But let’s keep rather mum on this, as I’m in the fledgling stages of a little somethin’-somethin’ with France and she’s a jealous one. Oui? 

Baci,
Liza

wack/wonderful Wednesdays

Wack

1. It was 75 degrees today, and you would have thought I was on the dunes of the Sahara the way I was carrying on. I was miserably hot- sweating like it was the end and fanning myself rather dramatically. In my defense, our black car has no AC and it’s at least 10 degrees warmer inside the car than out.
2. Being so sore from an exercise class Monday that I have to ease down into seats and walk like I have a slight deformity. Also, not being able to run & play with the kids at recess without wincing pathetically. It hurts, okay?!
3. Nosy German neighbors. Pretty positive it's none of your concern if I want to drive the wrong way down our one-way road. Well, maybe it is...but you don't need to shake your head and yell something at me. Especially when I know for a fact you spend your days listening to Johnny Cash and smoking weed. I wonder what "glass house", "stones", and "throw" translate to in German?      
   

Wonderful

1.  Zack came to visit me at work today, and ate lunch with the children. It was adorable in every way.  (I was just glad today’s lunch was macaroni & cheese and not some unidentifiable brown meat, as is rather typical.) 
2. Wearing a chiffon maxi skirt that flows like water. Instead of walking, I swished & swirled everywhere today. 
3. Making myself go to the gym after work. I know it sounds stupid and insignificant, but this is kind of a big deal. I am able to talk myself out of pretty much any type of physical activity, I will literally find anything to do besides work out. Once I sorted all of the coins we have in our house to avoid the Insanity workout of the day. It's a problem.
4. Dinner (Greek!) with some gorgeous girls at one of my favorite restaurants- Poseidon. So much giggling and fun stories, it hurts my heart to know I'm leaving such wonderful people so soon. 

Apparently somewhere along the lines I was possessed by a demon. But that's not the point of the picture.

(belated) Beelitz

Zack: "Hey, would you want to go explore an old, abandoned hospital?"

Me: (blank state, insulted beyond all reason he would even ask me if I was interested in such a thing.) "Is the sky blue?"

Obviously when Zack first told me of Beelitz Heilstätten Sanitorium, I was hooked. If you know me at all, you know I have a borderline freakish obsession with abandoned buildings. So the prospect of getting to explore an old German hospital was almost too much for my little heart to bear.

 It worked out perfectly, as Beelitz is only about 45 minutes outside of Berlin, smack-dab in the middle of our Spring Break path. We stopped around 3PM, thinking it'd be a quick pop in & out. 

How wrong we were. We quickly found out Beelitz is a complex comprised of 60 buildings. The majority of the buildings were in great condition, except for one- the women's ward. It was bombed extensively during WWII, and was basically just a shell- dim and heavy with silence . Compounded exponentially by the fact that I found out later it was the building in which the "Beast of Beelitz" (an area serial killer in the 90's) took his victims. Had I known that, I'm not sure I would have tramped around so blissfully. (Who am I kidding? Of course I would have.) 

The women's ward was also the building that gave me the most uncomfortable feeling. You'd think one would feel uncomfortable in most all of the old hospital, but I was not only at ease during our explorations, but high with excitement. The bombed out building had a different feel though, a saturated ache that seemed to weigh the walls down and a sadness that floated around each corner. I'm not sure if it was actually occupied with women (and babies..) during the WWII bombing, or the Nazis had completely taken over the complex at that point. Regardless, I felt strange while listening to my boots echo the halls. My voice sounded small and too high when I called out for Zack, nervous because I was alone. The fact that I found a room filled with burned down candles in a circle, and a huge pentagram drawn on the wall did little to quell the tightness that was beginning to constrict my throat. 

 

 

 

 Fortunately, all of the other buildings were much more fun to explore and we did just that until the sun began to set, and we lost our light. (Stupidly, we did not bring flashlights.) It was so much fun trying to figure out what each building was used for, as well as the different instruments and objects we saw in them. I know I probably annoyed Zack to the point of madness with all of my inquiries. "What do you think this room was for?" "Why is there a table in the middle of this room?" "Where do you think the emergency room was?" (As if he would know any better than I.) 

If you're as much of a freak about this kind of thing as I am, you can read far more about Beelitz here and here. (Seriously- even if you're a normal person, this is fascinating stuff.) 

 

 

 

wack/wonderful Wednesdays

wack

1. I wore jeans, a long-sleeved blouse, riding boots, & a trench coat today. And I was still cold. It is May 16th. How is that okay Germany? Also, hailing with blue skies? I'm so very confused.

2. Skipping TBX (the exercise class I typically attend on Mondays & Wednesdays) to instead eat buttered popcorn, eat Jolly Ranchers, & Pin my little heart out. I really don't know why I get so agitated at the scale...it's no one's fault but my own.

3. Expensive RyanAir flights. RyanAir is a budget (and I do mean budget) airline that we have always flown with to hop around Europe. Typically you don't pay more than 50€ for a round-trip flight. Seeing as we only have four weekends left to travel, it's balls-to-the-wall travel time and we are looking to book up the weekends. Unfortunately all the places we want to go, the flights are 150€+ per person. Y'all need to get out of here with that mess, RyanAir. You know you aren't worth that- quit trippin'. But I guess we will suck it up & pay it, because who knows when we'll be back 'round these parts again.

4. Spargel (white asparagus.) It's everywhere here when it's in season and it's just awkward. 

wonderful

1. Zack & I were going to have a little dinner date at one of the little German restaurants in Idar-O, but we were both so tired after work, we said forget it. So we had a very random dinner of brats, salad, & leftover guacamole. Dessert? Ritter Sport bars, strawberries, and Reddi-Wip. 

2. The mother of one of the students in the class I work in had her reenlistment ceremony at the school, so our class got to be a part of it. It was really adorable, her children held the flag in the background while she took her oath. Plus, I got a sweet goodie bag filled with sweet candy out of it. 

3. I think we found the vehicle we're going to buy once we get to Missouri. It's just a compact SUV...nothing amazing, but it's probably going to feel like a Maserati compared to what I'm driving now.

4. Wine. Wine is always wonderful.  

muttertag

  

"A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie."  ~Tenneva Jordan

Happy Mother's Day to all the mommies out there. You make this world a softer, sweeter, and more lovely place. 

I am sending all of my love across the Atlantic Ocean today, hoping it lands directly on my own beautiful mother. There aren't enough words of thanks to say for all you have done for me the last 25 years of my life. By teaching me how to be a good, kind person, giving me a magical and creative childhood, sacrificing so much of yourself to give me everything I could ever want, and loving me (although maybe not liking me!) through every stage of my life. I look forward to the next chapter of our lives together, as not only mother & daughter, but as friends. I love you so very much.

Also, it became very clear to me the other day that I am indeed turning into my mother- I realized I go through a jar of peanut butter in a week too. But she's got killer cheekbones, a sense of grace that leaves people in awe, and knows a ridiculous amount about flowers. So it's probably not such a bad thing.

weekend

Yesterday was supposed to be one for the books, in the best way possible. It was not. 

 

Today is very much needed- for me, for him, for us. Because I've been to Brussels three times now (First World Problems..), we decided we're going to stick with Belgium, but go to Antwerp. I'm not researching things to do or see there, I'm not bringing our travel books, I'm not stressing myself out with trying to take pictures of every thing I see. We are going there with no agenda other than to stuff as much chocolate, waffles, and trappist beer as possible into ourselves. That, and remind ourselves me that life is good, our love is great, and the sun will rise tomorrow, no matter how stressed things seem. 

Tot ziens world, see you Monday.